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"Children with high self-esteem can forge their own path when faced with difficulties."
"Educational policies that foster self-esteem."
You often see the term "self-esteem" a lot these days, don't you?
How do you nurture self-esteem, and how do you boost it in the first place?
This time, we interviewed a former preschool teacher about children's "self-esteem."
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Many of you, while raising children, have probably seen or heard the term "self-esteem."
Self-esteem and early childhood education are deeply intertwined, so let's think about self-esteem this time.
What is self-esteem?
First of all, what is self-esteem? It is expressed in terms such as "the feeling of accepting oneself as one is" or "the feeling of liking oneself, both good and bad."
The root of self-esteem is the "feeling of being loved." This is a feeling that can be nurtured through interaction with adults.
The Importance of Self-Esteem and its Close Relationship with Parenting and Early Childhood Education
I mentioned that self-esteem and early childhood education are deeply connected, but what does that mean?
It's easy to overthink early childhood education, but interaction with adults is early childhood education itself. Reading a picture book to a child is early childhood education, and eating a meal together is also early childhood education. And during infancy, children absorb and grow rapidly from even small interactions with adults.
Interaction with adults in a child's daily life is early childhood education, and from that, self-esteem is born. That's why self-esteem and early childhood education are deeply connected.
Self-esteem becomes the strength for children to solve problems themselves when they encounter challenges in the future. If self-esteem grows from "the feeling of being loved," don't you want them to feel that way a lot?
Home-based initiatives to foster self-esteem
If there's a hint, it's "small everyday efforts." From here, I will introduce examples of how to implement such initiatives at home that can serve as hints.
Initiatives that can be done from infancy
Cuddle with all your heart
This involves picking up a baby with all your heart.
Even just that seems to make babiessense things, as if they understand a lot.
It becomes difficult to carry them as they grow, but this approach can also be applied to hugging them when they seek affection.
Live Commentary
It's also interesting to do a live commentary, verbally describing each of your child's movements.
For example, once they start recognizing objects and touching them, you can say, "You're looking" or "You touched it."
When they can sit and eat, saying things like "You ate your vegetables" or "You're holding your rice" makes children feel "seen," which contributes to their self-esteem.
Even as they get older, this can be used in situations where you want them to do things themselves, like getting dressed or tidying up.
When they start understanding language
Conversation工夫
When children become good at speaking, just a little creativity in conversation can help foster self-esteem.
Instead of saying "Eat with a fork," changing it to "There's a fork, do you want to use it?" gives them the opportunity to make their own decision instead of feeling forced.
Once they start understanding clocks, instead of "It's time to tidy up," you can say "What time should we tidy up?" I think there are many ways to be creative.
Concepts like time can be applied even as they get older.
When they start to show an awareness of "listening"
Letting children listen to adult conversations
Conversations between familiar adults also provide education for children. These daily interactions between adults can also lead to self-esteem.
When children begin to develop self-awareness and assert themselves
Parroting back what they say
During the "terrible twos" or when a child is angry, it can be helpful for adults to parrot back what the child said. Hearing their own words can sometimes help children calm down.
Parroting back what they say can be used not only when a child is angry but also in various other situations. For example, when you don't understand what a child is saying, simply repeating their words back to them occasionally can give them the feeling of "being heard." This is a technique frequently used by preschool teachers.
When they can hold conversations with adults and start controlling their emotions
Deliberately giving a curt answer
When a child asks for something, intentionally giving a curt response can also be a method.
From that, the child experiences, "Being treated curtly makes me feel so uneasy." Immediately afterward, you follow up with, "I'm sorry,I'm doing something right now, so let's do it later." Then, they experience, "It's so different when it's said politely."
From this, children can learn necessary knowledge and communication skills.
Create bonding time
There are many busy parents juggling childcare, work, and household chores. It's a good idea to create some bonding time at night, even if it means going to bed a little later.
I've heard parents say, "My child naps at daycare, so that makes up for it," and I've often thought, "That makes sense."
When activities increase and children start to think for themselves
Try not to cheer them on
When a child tries to do something but can't, and is wondering whether to give up, instead of saying "You can do it" or "You can stop if you want to," just state the fact with a single word like, "You stopped."
Just by doing this, children will develop the ability to think for themselves, asking, "Is it really okay?"
Summary
This time, we discussed self-esteem and ways to foster it.
What's listed here is just one example. Both adults and children will make various discoveries from trying out these approaches, and those discoveries will likely lead to further endeavors.
Find your own methods and enjoy watching your child grow.